I want to focus on something closer to home: mental health. One of the taglines that we hear time and time again about Freemasonry is that it takes good men and makes them better. Yet, we often focus on physical ailments in our charitable and self-improvement endeavors and ignore the internal ones that plague not only many of our brethren but society as a whole.

One in five people in the United States is affected by some form of mental health issue (https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/mental-illness.shtml). According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/), the following statistics show that a key demographic of our membership—middle-aged white men—is particularly at risk:

The age-adjusted suicide rate in 2019 was 13.93 per 100,000 individuals.
The rate of suicide is highest in middle-aged white men.
In 2019, men died by suicide 3.63 times more often than women.
On average, there are 130 suicides per day.
White males accounted for 69.38% of suicide deaths in 2019.
In 2019, firearms accounted for 50.39% of all suicide deaths.
93% of U.S. adults surveyed believe suicide can be prevented.

My concern is that we belong to a predominantly male organization, and it is important that, in the exercise of brotherly love, we begin treating mental health awareness as a priority within our membership. Why? The answer is simple. Many of us have been conditioned to believe that we are not supposed to show weakness. This idea has been ingrained through socialization and reinforced by the media we consume.
We need to change that narrative. In practicing brotherly love, we must promote the idea that it is okay to show emotion. The lodge should be a sacred space where we can openly discuss our feelings and mental health, and lean on one another for support.
While our charities in Illinois, such as the Illinois Masonic Outreach Program (https://ilmasonicoutreach.org/), offer valuable services, their website does not currently highlight resources specifically addressing mental health for our members. A simple search for “Illinois Freemason mental health” yields results related to Advocate Illinois Masonic Medical Center, but little to no presence from the Illinois Grand Lodge itself. I suspect that many Grand Lodges lack dedicated resources to address what is, in reality, a critical health issue affecting their membership.

I am one of those members.

I live with depression and anxiety, and I have struggled with depression for most of my life. Like many others, I experience both good days and bad days. I have been on antidepressant medication for the past ten years, but only recently—after a long break—did I return to cognitive behavioral therapy with the help of a Licensed Clinical Social Worker.
As a private person, and as someone who once believed that expressing emotions was incompatible with masculinity, I delayed seeking help longer than I should have. Eventually, I reached a point where I realized I needed support to manage what I was feeling. In Masonic terms, I came to understand that I could not truly use the common gavel to improve my rough ashlar if I was not applying that work to every aspect of my life.
My hope in writing this is to reach even one brother who may be feeling the same way and to say: you are not alone.
You have brothers you can reach out to. If you are uncomfortable doing so, I am here—feel free to email me at darin.lahners@gmail.com. If you are in a dark place or experiencing thoughts of self-harm, please call 800-273-8255 or visit https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.